I haven't been driving on the interstate for very many years, 18 years to be exact. Where I grew up there wasn't a close interstate and really there wasn't any traffic, it was a one stop light town. (I love it, by the way). Anyway, since having kids, driving has become one my worst things. Not that I'm a bad driver, but I just panic over everything, I mean, EVERYTHING!
One day, about 5 or so years ago, we (our home school co-op) took a trip to Pittsburgh, PA. I was okay with this trip, it was the first time I drove to Pittsburgh but I had printed off the directions from map quest and was pretty confident that it would be a fine trip. We stopped at a rest stop before we got into town and one of the lead drivers had asked if everyone was fine and talked about the tunnels and on on... I had told him that the tunnels were closed for construction, he didn't know that and wasn't confident in getting into town the other way, so I had to forfeit my directions, my lifeline, my only way in and out.
So, panic sets in. Once I get there I find some friends who say they are leaving well before rush hour to avoid the traffic, so I tell them to not leave without me. In the meantime, I am in the beginning stages of a full blown panic attack. I didn't know what was happening, this has never happened before. I am losing my mind. Luckily, one of my friends suffered from them several times and informed me that I was indeed having a panic attack, which didn't really help the situation, because now, how am I going to get home. And we left right at 5:00! I forgot about any past victories that God had pulled me through. I was just focused on the fear...
I did make it home. It took several months for me to be able to be in the car without having some form of anxiety.
Flashback....(Before Pittsburgh trip)
I drove to Dover, Delaware. I followed my brother up so I wasn't worried about how to get there, but I had to come home, without written directions. Guess what, I prayed before I left his house. My prayer went something like this...God, you have parted the Red Sea a few times and I need you to part this Red Sea for me. I know you can do it and I am going to believe that I make it home without any problems. That means the traffic will be low and I will know exactly where I need to be. Jesus name, Amen. I made it, exactly as I had asked!
There were a couple of other times that the same exact thing had happened. And you know what, God answered my prayer exactly as I had asked. He cares about these things, the things that really get us worked up. He wants us to give them to Him and in the meantime, our faith is built.
I was sick and tired of being afraid to travel north on I79. I'm not sure why the residue of that Pittsburgh trip still lingered, but even going to Morgantown was a big issue. A few weeks ago, my sister-in-law was in from Texas to help with my father-in-law, who had knee replacement surgery, and she needed a ride back to the airport in Pittsburgh. Scott and I picked her up and we were going to take her back. Guess what? I volunteered to take her myself. That's right, not a passenger, but the driver. What was I thinking? So, the night before God reminded me that David rehearsed his victories. I envision David having a box of some sort with souvenirs from various battles. The jaw bones from the animals he killed, you know, all the fun stuff. And before he went into a battle that God wanted fought, he sat down and opened that box and remembered all the things that God had brought him through. So I opened up that box in my memory of the interstate battles, fought and won, with God's help and I kept rehearsing those victories in my mind and in my heart. My prayer that day went something like this...Okay God, it's me again. We've been down this road before and I know that you have brought me through, but I need you to part this Red Sea for me once again. Could you make the traffic light? Could you make it so there are no vehicles when I need to merge into traffic? Could you give me the wisdom to make quick decisions when I need to do so? Jesus name, amen.
I got in my Jeep and drove to Pittsburgh! No anxiety! And everything I asked for God granted. Another victory to be rehearsed in the future and my faith built.
I want to keep those victories in my memory box and open them regularly, not forgetting who holds my world in His hands. Do you realize how amazing that is?
Until next time, stay blessed.